Monday, October 18, 2010

TAR17, Recap Leg 4, 10/17/10

Welcome to Leg 4! Last time, on Never Ghana Give You Up?, teams kept racing through Ghana, where the Princeton boys failed a geography quiz and yet came in first place. Chad (!) commented on how awesome the kids of Africa were, and Michael got overheated, which made completing the Detour a challenge. But they did, only to find that they were not eliminated! Who will be eliminated. . . next? (click for more)

Arrival at the pit stop last episode:
1st – Connor/Jonathan, Team Glee
2nd – Gary/Mallory, The Hillbillies
3rd – Chad/Stephanie, Team Neverland
4th – Katie/Rachel, Team Jersey Shore
5th – Nick/Vicki, The Geniuses
6th – Brook/Claire, Team Infomercial
7th – Jill/Thomas, Team Who?
8th – Nat/Kat, Team ER
9th – Michael/Kevin, Team Internet

Home of Awusa Ntso, Doryumu, Ghana

Teams spend the pit stop fixing up the Asebi Primary school and giving it much needed foundation repairs and painting improvements. (Toyouke: “I like that they helped fix the school. Although Team Glee could have possibly not sung.“)

10:15 AM Connor/Jonathan (1st)
Clue: Fly 4500 miles to Kiruma, Sweden! This municipality is located in Lapland, north of the Arctic Circle. Tickets have been procured through Frankfurt, but teams are under no obligation to use them. Once there, teams drive themselves to Jukkasjärvi to find the summer home of the Icehotel. You have $184 for this leg of the race.

(Toyouke: “Guaranteed plane tickets? Trying to avoid the TAR All-Stars African transportation clusterfuck?” Kmanpat: “Most likely.”)

The Princeton boys are on the leg that coincides with their Princeton graduation. This could be good or bad foreshadowing. (Toyouke: “Graduation, pff.”)

11:19 AM Gary/Mallory (2nd)
11:29 AM Chad/Stephanie (3rd)
– and Stephanie apparently hates snow. This could be fun.

12:12 PM Katie/Rachel (4th) – (Toyouke: “So...blonde girl's half-Swedish and it's as useful to her as my half-Japanese would be if we went to Japan.”)
12:23 PM Nick/Vicki (5th)
12:24 PM Brook/Claire (6th)
– Claire: “We decided to wear our really cute pink and black spandex outfits, and now we’re poorly dressed for the snow. But we sparkle!” (Toyouke: “Stupid Team HSN.”)
12:29 PM Jill/Thomas (7th)
1:12 PM Nat/Kat (8th)
1:26 PM Michael/Kevin (9th)
– (Toyouke: “Wow, Michael and Kevin weren't that far behind.”)

Teams take taxis to Kotoka International Airport and arrive in the following order:

1- Connor/Jonathan
2- Gary/Mallory
3- Chad/Stephanie
4- Katie/Rachel
5- Nick/Vicki
6- Brook/Claire
7- Jill/Thomas
8- Nat/Kat
9- Michael/Kevin
– who make a phone call on their cab driver’s cell phone and find out about a flight that leaves for Kiruma two hours earlier from Frankfurt. (Toyouke: “Yay! Smart racing!”)

When they arrive, Michael and Kevin tell the hillbillies and use Mallory’s blondness to sweet talk an airport worker into getting them on the flight. (Toyouke: “No! Collaboration is not smart racing!”) In the meantime, Nat and Kat use the internet to find the same flight, and Brook and Claire discover them doing it. Thus, the flights shake down in the following order:

First Flight, 7:35 AM from Frankfurt
1) Nat/Kat
2) Gary/Mallory
3) Brook/Claire
4) Michael/Kevin

Second Flight, 9:51 AM from Frankfurt
1) Connor/Jonathan
2) Chad/Stephanie
3) Katie/Rachel
4) Nick/Vicki
5) Jill/Thomas

Teams arrive in Kiruma in the following order:

1- Gary/Mallory
2- Brook/Claire
3- Nat/Kat
4- Michael/Kevin
5- Connor/Jonathan
6- Jill/Thomas
7- Katie/Rachel
8- Nick/Vicki
9- Chad/Stephanie

Teams drive themselves to Jukkasjärvi and arrive at the Icehotel in the following order:

1- Brook/Claire
2- Nat/Kat
3- Gary/Mallory
4- Michael/Kevin
5- Katie/Rachel
6- Connor/Jonathan
7- Nick/Vicki
8- Chad/Stephanie
9- Jill/Thomas

However, once they arrive, Michael and Kevin find the Speed Bump.

SPEED BUMP:

A speed bump is a task that must be performed by the last place team on a non-elimination leg. Once they complete this task, they may return to the place where the speed bump occurred and continue the leg. In this speed bump, teams must sit on the ice furniture of the Icehotel for ten minutes. Once completed, they will receive their next clue.

(Toyouke: “That's it?! Sit for 10 minutes?!?!!??!!?!? I mean, I'm glad because I love Kevin and Michael, but seriously.”)

Teams complete the Speed Bump in the following order:

1- Michael/Kevin

After much sitting (really?), they continue with the rest of the teams in getting the clue in the ice block, which says Pietarajätvivägen Fjellborgs vid Väkkäräjärvi. This sends teams to the Fjellborgs Lodge.

Teams arrive at the lodge in the following order:

1- Michael/Kevin
2- Gary/Mallory
3- Brook/Claire
– Claire: “Watch out for axe murderers!” (Toyouke: “Ax murderers don't come out during the day. Duh.”)
4- Nat/Kat
5- Katie/Rachel
6- Connor/Jonathan
7- Chad/Stephanie
8- Nick/Vicki
9- Jill/Thomas
– who miss an arrow and wander through the woods, a la Tammi and Victor. (Toyouke: “Ah...wandering the wilderness. Just like Victor.”)

And teams come to the fourth roadblock.

ROADBLOCK:
Who’s feeling kind of mushy?

In this roadblock, one team member must get on a training dog sled and travel a marked path while collecting five flags. Once complete, teams trade their flags to a hunter for a bundle of pelts. For every flag missed, roadblockers need to take a lap around the hunter’s lodge. Once they have collected the pelts, they return to the start. Once complete, the docent will give them their next clue.

(Toyouke: “OK, I know last week I said that dogsledding without snow was stupid, but this actually sounds pretty cool.”)

The following team members complete the Roadblock.

1- Michael – who passes a bear. (Toyouke: “FAKEST BEAR EVER seriously that was so lame”)

2- Mallory – who is the only person to miss a flag.
3- Claire – whose kiss of the trapper is number six for her team. (Toyouke: “"Kiss count"? Really? I'm not sure if that's the image you want to present to the country.”)
4- Kat
5- Katie
6- Connor
7- Stephanie
8- Nick
9- Jill

After much dog sledding, teams complete the Roadblock in the following order:

1- Michael/Kevin
2- Brook/Claire
3- Gary/Mallory
4- Nat/Kat
5- Connor/Jonathan
6- Nick/Vicki
7- Katie/Rachel
8- Chad/Stephanie
9- Jill/Thomas


Teams are then instructed to drive themselves to Vassijaure Train Station to get their next clue.

So, teams arrive at the train station in the following order:

1- Michael/Kevin
2- Nat/Kat
3- Gary/Mallory
4- Brook/Claire
5- Connor/Jonathan
6- Chad/Stephanie
7- Katie/Rachel
8- Nick/Vicki
9- Jill/Thomas
– (Toyouke: “Foreshadowing is laughing at Jill and Thomas.”)

And we get the Detour Clue.

DETOUR:
Sleds OR Beds
*Sleds: Teams must take a ski lift to the top of a mountain and use a tech sled to travel a set course on the mountain in 1:58. If both team members make it down in the allotted time, they get their next clue. If not, teams must return to the top of the mountain and repeat the task until both team members can complete in the allotted time.
*Beds: Teams must find the Sami dwelling and build a goahti, a traditional tent. Once completed and comfortable, the tribe will give them their next clue.

1-Michael/Kevin choose Beds
2-Nat/Kat choose Sleds
– and take two tries to complete.
3-Gary/Mallory choose Sleds – and take two tries to complete.
4-Brook/Claire choose Sleds
5-Connor/Jonathan choose Sleds
– and take four tries to complete. (Auburnium0513: “Jonathan can't sled to save his life.”) And then Bald Snark at the last minute to Beds. Not good racing boys. If you’re the last ones at the task, you should stay.
6-Chad/Stephanie choose Sleds – and try the course once, and then Stephanie convinces him to Bald Snark to Beds. (Toyouke: “Wow, Connor is so supportive of his partner who sucks at sledding, CHAD.”)
7-Katie/Rachel choose Sleds – Katie: “I hate flying down mountains at high speeds.” And they Bald Snark to Beds.
8-Nick/Vicki choose Sleds
9-Jill/Thomas choose Beds
- and decide that since they are in last and it looks like a long task to use the Express Pass. (Toyouke: “Well, while I do applaud Jill and Thomas trying the other Detour option, in an effort to gain time, had they actually tried to do it instead of use the Express Pass, that would have been pretty stupid.”)

Teams complete the detour in the following order:

1- Nat/Kat
2- Brook/Claire
3- Gary/Mallory
4- Michael/Kevin
5- Jill/Thomas
6- Nick/Vicki
7- Chad/Stephanie
– (Toyouke: “Oh, now that they're not losing, Stephanie's not a disappointment. Asshat.”)
8- Katie/Rachel
9- Connor/Jonathan

Teams get their clue and find that they must drive themselves to the Sweden-Norway border, the PIT STOP of the fourth leg of this racearoundtheworld. (Toyouke: “Oo, the border. Exciting.”) The last team to arrive MAY be eliminated!

1- Nat/Kat
2- Gary/Mallory
3- Brook/Claire
4- Michael/Kevin
5- Jill/Thomas
6- Nick/Vicki
7- Chad/Stephanie
8- Katie/Rachel
9- Connor/Jonathan

And Connor and Jonathan are the last team to arrive. So, they throw their hats since this is their graduation day. And then they sing this great parody of “Amazing Grace.” And I wonder why in seventeen seasons this is the FIRST time anyone has thought to do that. Anyway, first to worst, no more singing.


ORDER NOW:
1st – Nat/Kat
2nd – Gary/Mallory
3rd – Brook/Claire
4th – Michael/Kevin
5th – Jill/Thomas
6th – Nick/Vicki
7th – Chad/Stephanie
8th – Katie/Rachel

Next week: Teams celebrate Christmas, Norwegian style! I feel like there is reindeer eating. (Toyouke: “I do believe that's a sheep head. “) And Claire is hanging. (Toyouke: “Also, Claire FINALLY tells Brooke to shut up.”) FINALLY. Until next time!

No comments: