Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Project Runway 9/24/08--"Rock 'N Runway" summary

Previously on Project Runway: everyone had to make outfits for women entering the workforce. They managed to find some designers and whatnot who wouldn’t need conservative clothing, but Joe for some reason still made a suit. That was ill-fitting and made his client look really fat. He went home for that. Kenley decided that she would make her client dress like her, but they liked it for some reason. Also the boys at Project Rungay pointed out that she told Tim she wouldn’t cut the tulle from her dress, but then she did. So not only is she going around talking about how Tim doesn’t know anything, she is secretly listening to him. Jerell won the challenge, with a simple but elegant outfit for his client. (click for more)

Korto is not thinking about going home. Suede’s been in the bottom for 3 weeks in a row. He’s not even talking about himself in the third person he’s so worried. Leanne would love all girls in the final 3 but she knows Jerell is talented.

Heidi says everyone will get to repick their models. They all do so, with some minor drama about how people having advantages and whatever. Then Heidi sends them off to Tim with no hints.

Jerell interviews that he has stopped guessing challenges. Tim says they will be designing…big pause…for each other. Then WHY THE HELL did you pick models??? God this show sometimes. Korto rolls her eyes and says she just wants to make something cool for her model that shows her as a designer. Amen, sister. Here is the breakdown: Suede must make clothes for Jerell (who says he is a difficult client, and then Suede says to bring it on because Suede is getting his model Tia back); Kenley designs for Leanne (ha); Korto for Suede (Kenley laughs, shut up); Jerell for Kenley (HA); Leanne for Korto. But wait, there’s more! The looks have to be inspired by a particular musical genre. Jerell thinks that is perfect and right up his alley. Tim picks from the bag for genres: Kenley‘s outfit must be inspired by pop, and I thought Tim said “pot” which was hilarious, but “pop” is even better; Suede will wear punk (Korto rolls her eyes); Korto gets stuck with country (oh she’s pissed now); Leanne has hip hop (Kenley has to make a hip hop outfit? HA); Jerell has rock and roll. Jerell seems to be the only one who likes this challenge. They’ve only got until 1am tonight.

1 hour for consultations. Korto listens to Suede and then tells him to let her know if he has problems, because if he waits until Tim shows up she’ll have to snap on him. Kenley wants to know from Leanne what she would wear if she was all hip hop, and Leanne says something about gangster, and then Kenley whines that she doesn’t want to do gangster. Tough. Then Leanne raps in the whitest way possible but she works in the line “it better not look like it’s from 1953” so it’s funny. Kenley is for some unknown reason talking about how awesome high-waisted pants are. Wow, that is so wrong I can’t even think of what to say. High waisted jeans? Seriously? For a hip hop look? Do you live in a hole? Leanne looks worried. Kenley thinks she will make Leanne look good. Jerell asks for a cape. Suede is listening to his inner voice and worries about getting in trouble for a dated look. Jerell is planning to make “Kenley Spears”. Heee! Leanne thinks country music stars are put together, and she does understand that “country” is not Korto’s style. Kenley butts in to make Leanne try something on, and Korto is like, go on with yourself, you had your 30 minutes. Then she threatens to get all hip hop if Kenley doesn’t leave. LOVE. Kenley starts to talk or something but Korto yells over her all what what!? I almost missed the fact that Kenley thinks gold strappy heels with a big fat ankle strap are hip hop. Hip hop video, maybe.

Shopping time! $150. Jerell wants to make Kenley into a pop diva and he says everything will be stretchy and netting. (Kmanpat: “I kind of want Jerell’s outfit to suck just because Kenley will have to stand there wearing it that whole time.”) Kenley has some print, which is not hip hop. Tim even says so but she brushes him off. Korto asks for stretch denim for Suede.

12 hours to work! Korto has renamed herself “Shania Jenk”, jenk like jenkity. Leanne and Jerell decide her name is “Lil’ Lee J. Blige”. Kenley is making a leather jacket and a high waisted jean. The jacket looks cropped. Sigh. She’s never made pants before so she’s nervous. I think she’s made them in the past but not on the show, that‘s for sure. Korto sees Kenley’s blouse but she has no interest in giving Kenley any kind of advice. Jerell seems to agree. Yeah, it’s a cropped blouse in one of Kenley’s favorite 80’s couch upholstery style prints. Not hip hop.

Jerell brags about how he’s won twice in a row and Korto is like, over it. He goes to show Kenley his outfit, and while he is describing it in confessional he’s all, “So, for Kenley’s final look, I’m doing a fishnet minidress with diamond cuffs.” Well played, Jerell. Well played. The “cuffs” seem to mean a diamond collar. Kenley doesn’t want to be sexed up by Jerell. Heh. Also ew. Suede tells Korto he usually wears baggy clothes but he’s OK with tighter things. Then he says he’s a classically trained cellist. WTF. He’s not punk at all. I’ll say. Korto tells us that in the name of Jesus she’s going to Bryant Park. Suede has stretchy pants and cuffs. Then he starts namedropping about Jordache. Lord. Korto tries on some country boots, and Jerell is like, you know you have boots like that at home, and then Korto starts singing and line dancing. Hee. Leanne wants to put spurs on them. It’s so random. Kenley goes to try on the dress Jerell has made but she can’t figure out how to put it on. Oh my God in heaven! I might die of laughter. The dress is fishnets, all of it, with only a strip down the center of her torso and then the skirt, which is very short. So you can see her white bra underneath the dress. Then at the neckline there is the high diamond collar and the netting doesn’t come up that far. Oh, I want Kenley to have to wear that, it sucks so bad. On closer inspection it’s not a white bra but rhinestones like the collar. Then Jerell is draping neon green leopard print on her legs. She doesn’t want to show that much of her body.

Tim time! Tim loves Jerell’s silhouette, but it needs more, but the right more. When Jerell shows Tim the other fabrics he has for “more” Tim yelps in dismay. There is a vest in the works. Tim just leaves him to his work. Leanne has a purple shirt, knotted at the waist, and some sort of black and white checked scarf. Tim thinks it might be too subtle, but Leanne doesn’t want it to be costumey. So there is a line to walk. Korto didn’t want to go “all the way punk” because she wants to avoid clichés. But she might not be far enough and it’s kind of basic. She’s going to push it. Suede has some leather thing. Tim is silent which freaks Suede out. He thinks it’s not ramped up enough. There are 5 people left and he should go all out. He’s happy overall but will make alterations. Tim makes Kenley explain hip hop to him. She says lots of hip hop stars wear leather jackets and dark denim, and mentions her high waisted jeans, but Tim is like, I’m an old fart, so I might be wrong, but isn’t hip hop oversized? Kenley tells him that’s 80’s hip hop. She doesn’t want Leanne to look stupid. Then she gets offended? I think? That’s what it sounds like but it’s such a random reaction. Tim reminds her that he’s here to support her, and she needs to listen. Kenley of course thinks it’s just that Tim doesn’t understand her outfit. Tim’s response: “It would help if you removed the sarcasm and the facetiousness, it would help a lot. You just think I’m being snarky.” No, Tim, all of us out here have more than enough snark for you. P.S. “facetiousness”, awesome. Korto interviews that Kenley is rude and even if you don’t agree with Tim he at least deserves respect. Finally that is over. I doubt Kenley learned anything. She confirms this by saying in confessional that she can’t listen to Tim right now and what does he know about hip hop anyway? More than you, 50’s girl.

Kenley puts the pants on Leanne and they are tight high waisted jeans with giant gold buttons. This is joined to a voiceover where Kenley says she knows way more about hip hop than Tim does. Those pants are so far from hip hop…I can’t even respond to her anymore. It’s like when you’re arguing with a very stubborn person and you finally just agree to shut them up because you realize you won’t get through and it’s not worth getting yourself all riled up. And she’s not even here. Leanne won’t lie if the outfit sucks. Especially not for Kenley. Korto can’t wait for tomorrow. She’s bleaching the sneakers and pants to soften the fabric. So now everywhere smells of bleach. Suede thinks his outfit will either be loved or hated. No “meh” for him.

Jerell in the morning thinks that he can sabotage Suede, but he might not. But he is thinking about it. Kenley refuses to change anything for Tim.

Leanne thinks she can get everything done even though she has a lot to get done. Tim comes to give them an hour, which kind of sucks because usually they just send off the models and keep working. Jerell implies that Korto’s ass is too big to be country. The leather jacket Leanne has to wear is tight and has elbow length sleeves. Kenley says there is a little bunching in the crotch but nothing she thinks the judges will notice. This pretty much guarantees they’ll notice. She asks Jerell for some suggestions and he agrees, not that he really thinks it’s a good idea, but because he doesn‘t care if her outfit is ugly. Kenley looks like Miley Cyrus. There is some crazy hair going on. Tim comes in and laughs at everyone. Everyone is confident.

Heidi introduces the challenge to the judges. Hee. LL Cool J is the guest judge. OH this will be good. Leanne: purple sleeveless shirt tied at the waist, with a bandana around Korto’s neck, and a long black slim skirt, and boots. All of Korto’s curls are piled on her head, which certainly is a Dolly Parton type of look. The skirt for some reason has a gold Wonder Woman belt thing. The skirt has gold underlining and the shirt has gold trim. It’s cute. Although, giant peacock earrings? Jerell: Wow. The dress has a mini skirt in black (the bottom of the skirt has some sheer trim), and then the black narrows to a slim ribbon that goes up to her neck and ends in a diamond/rhinestone collar. The netting starts further down (but still high) and fills in the space. Over her boobs there are more crystals. Then a purple cropped vest. Tall black boots too. And Kenley has her hair all blown out and seriously, she looks like Miley Cyrus, not that Miley would wear anything that skanky. You can tell she hates it. Kenley: Now that I see the whole thing, styling and all, I finally know what’s going on. Leanne looks like Mariah Carey. Not that I think Mariah is particularly hip hop, but at least Kenley didn’t make up her whole outfit out of nowhere. Tight high waisted jeans with big gold buttons, print blouse that is mostly hidden by black leather jacket with elbow length sleeves. Lots of giant gold hoop jewelry that is probably as close as bluefly.com gets to bling. Leanne’s hair is pulled back with long bangs sweeping over her face. And some purple hair too. And a purse for some reason. Kenley whines that Leanne looks like a poseur and she doesn’t have the attitude. She is trying to make gangster poses, but I think the outfit makes her more of a poseur. Korto: loose jeans that are all spotted from the bleach, some chains and metal in belt, sleeveless shirt with diagonal strips of fabric like slashes. Suede has some colored extensions in his hair and dark lipstick and eye makeup. The colored hair keeps him from being emo. It’s not bad, actually. Suede: Jerell is really skinny. You can tell, it actually works for rock and roll. Black pants, black leather vest, T-shirt that is very very close to Jerell’s actual skin tone so it looks like he is topless and has a great tattoo. Giant heavy punk boots. Actually it looks like it’s not a T-shirt but one of Jerell’s sternum exposing tank tops.

Heidi introduces the judges since they weren’t here before. Kenley craps her pants. Ha. Korto explains how she bleached the pants and that the top is suede (hee). LL loves it, and Nina thinks he looks like Marilyn Manson, which shows that she has no idea about that. Kors tries to ignore the accessories and says that it’s a good silhouette. I think Kors just said Suede looks hot. He sounds embarrassed about it. Suede’s vest, closer up, has patches or something. It’s patchwork. Jerell likes it. Kors likes the vest but he’s bored by the pants. Suede insists the pants are awesome, and LL says that subtlety doesn’t work for the stage. He and Nina both want some more drama or oomph or something. Heidi says that Jerell looks like Jerell. Oo. Jerell wanted to sex Kenley up. She thinks it’s pop. Nina totally loves it, especially the sparkly boobs. Heidi wants a bra for her boobs, and LL is like, they look supported! Ew. Kors says it’s not vulgar. And now we’re to Kenley. She says that she thinks this is hip hop and it’s also classy and expensive. Heidi just asks her what happened to the pants. Kenley is like, what, the pants rock. You can see the zipper isn’t lying flat anymore. Heidi tells her that these are the most unflattering pants she’s ever seen in her life. LL finds that the jeans are a problem, and it doesn’t look like hip hop. Kenley starts talking about baggy jeans, and LL is quick to say that’s not what he wants, but he says that Leanne doesn’t look like she’s a part of hip hop culture, and he would know. Nina finds that it doesn’t make the point. Kenley is like, all right! Like they are only picking on her. Kors wants something luxurious, and Kenley is like, I need more time for that, so Nina shuts her down by reminding her that there are 4 other people up there with the same time constraints and it’s hard for everyone. Oh, Nina is done with her. Leanne describes her country look, which actually did have some “vintage Dolly Parton” in it. Korto did want old school so it works. Nina loves the color but she wants more glamour, mostly because the skirt is kind of boring. The shape is great though. LL doesn’t know if it reads country, and Kors thinks it could be nudged up a little.

Kors thinks the hair and makeup did transform everyone, but the designing was wonky. Good: Jerell: (Kenley was hot and obviously pop, and not trashy), Korto: (very obviously punk, fit well, the bleach was good, felt authentic). Bad: Suede: (well made but boring, he’s too safe, not explosive enough, Jerell still looked like Jerell and on a daily basis Jerell’s actual clothes are more out there), Kenley (you could buy it at the mall, horrid jeans that were not special, totally lost and you could tell); Leanne (started out well but didn’t go far enough, not special).

The winner is announced first, and that is Korto! Nice. She’s thrilled that she did menswear, and she did it well. Jerell is in. Leanne is in. Suede played it safe, which is very un-rock and roll, and Kenley had no glamour and no attitude. Kenley is in. Dammit. It’s not that I don’t like her style, it’s that she won’t follow the challenges and she fights everyone all the time and she‘s rude to Tim. Suede is glad to have made the top 5. Then he quotes Madonna and says he’s ready to dress her up in suede. Blah.

Next week: field trip! Kenley appears to have lost some of her fabric, Korto and Jerell cry, Kenley bitches about something…everyone rolls their eyes.

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