Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Project Runway 11/28/07--"Fashion Giant" summary

Previously on Project Runway: Sarah Jessica Parker showed up and made teams come up with cheap clothes for her new line, and Victorya won. Marion went home, because his dress looked like a bad Army blanket. And I was sad to miss a team challenge, because they’re easier to recap. Surprisingly, it was mostly a drama-free team challenge, which is unusual. Completely unrelated, I’d like to state for the record that RuPaul would make the best guest judge ever.(click for more) Our daily shot of Jack in underwear. This prefaces his announcement that he’s HIV positive. Someone (I think Chris) says they should have gotten rid of Christian because no one would have cried. Chris laughs hysterically while Christian insists they‘d be bored if he left. Christian is still convinced he’s the bestest designer there.

Heidi shows up and she tells them they don’t need models for their challenge. Eh? She sends them to 10 Rockefeller Plaza to meet Tim. When they get there (and after I am distracted by Jack’s gorgeous upper body in a tank top) they meet up with Tiki Barber. A surprising number of them recognize him. Well, he’s on the Today Show now, so I guess it could be from that. Ricky comes through for me by saying he doesn’t know who this guy is but he’s hot. All Steven knows about football is that it’s the one time when spandex is acceptable. Tiki wants the designers to make an outfit for him to wear on the Today Show. Woo!! Most people freak out. Not only do they have no experience with menswear, he’s not built like the average man. He likes dark colors with texture but is not afraid of bright colors, he likes details, and it doesn’t have to be a suit. I love it.

Why is Jack carrying people? I think that’s Christian. Jack just carried him into the workroom for some reason. Back at Parsons Tim gives them a day and a half, $150, and 30 minutes to sketch. Jack asks if he can use items of clothing he’s wearing as a base. Tim says that’s cool. That sucks for girls. Sweet P has never done men’s clothing and she doesn’t even know where to start. Seriously, like, they’re almost all just sitting there. Kevin is busy working and seems to have borrowed Ricky’s hat for his interview. Some of the men are getting measured but none of them are built like Tiki so I don’t know what that’s about. Shopping at Mood is only entertaining because Chris asks Tim if Tiki likes hot pants. Kit insists that she is a stylist for television so she knows what looks good.

Ricky has to show them he can make a suit. Sweet P is also doing a suit, even though she has no idea about any of it. Christian says he’s a fast sewer. Carmen asks Jack about the width of the waistband, and she’s asking a million questions and he’s really helpful. I continue to be distracted by Jack’s bare arms. Suddenly he is wearing a muslin skirt and someone has drawn cherries on his ass. (my friend Kmanpat: “…Lucky.“) Victorya and Carmen steal his shorts to trace them also. Rami doesn’t think it’s fair. Rami could have used his pants too. Sweet P for some reason thinks they might not be able to share patterns, or something. I would say that’s probably a valid question, since this usually doesn’t happen. Jack is unconcerned. Kit says the claws are out. Sweet P knocks her mannequin over (I think they have male forms).

Tim appears to call time at midnight, just as people are figuring out they have a ton of work to do. Steven says he’s wearing a pimp hat, but I think it’s Jillian’s hat. “It’s midnight, and I’m standing here in a pimp’s hat. Just like home.” Hee.

In the morning someone tells their roommates this will be the last time they’ll have fun today. Once in Parsons they buckle down and start working. Ricky rips something, and flips off the fabric while cursing. (Me: “Sadly, I have done that.”) Christian starts bragging about his speed, which makes me think he’s in for a fall. Chris reminds us he’s older than everyone else, and also pants are two big sleeves sewn together. Rami drapes his pants, which look fab, but then he ruins it by being all, “And they’re not traced off of a pattern, like some other pants. I’m not accusing anyone! I’m just saying! I know that some did!“ shut up Rami. Tim brings their models. He prefaces this by saying he has a “very nice announcement”. OH YEAH. I know that male models are not built like Tiki Barber. Work with me. I am distracted. Chris helps me out by letting us know that “everyone was looking all over the place at all these…(big pause and deep breath) disrobing men.” Bravo knows their audience because there are never so many gratuitous shots of the female models. Kevin appears to be the only straight guy so he’s not impressed. Steven finally gets when his straight friends are jealous of his hanging around with hot girls. Elisa won’t look at her model undressing so she misses out on the fun. She says that her boyfriend is the only one she’s “fitted on intimately”, whatever that means, and she “he’s the only male I choose to touch.“ (Kmanpat: “I’ll touch her model! Pick me pick me!“) Ricky has to drape the muslin on his model, he‘s so far behind, and Sweet P has to start over. Jillian has to redo everything too.

Tim’s second visit and the room seems deadly silent. He asks them to gather round, and he has a special guest. In walks an Asian woman, who is Ginny Barber, Tiki’s wife. She’s going to critique their work. Oo, extra pressure. She looks fab. Christian likes Asians because “Asians are fierce.“ I would argue that a lot of Asians are introverted, judging from, you know, normal Asians like my family and not, say, Kimora Lee. But I like to be fierce so I’ll let it slide for now. Jack has a vest/shirt/pants combo which sounds good. Ricky has a 3 piece suit. Apparently Tiki likes layering. Ricky feels in danger from all the work he still has to do. Kevin is making a pocket square! Clinton Kelly would be so proud. And a double vent in the jacket, to account for his bubble butt. Ginny says that Carmen’s jacket is too casual and is too Member’s Only. That’s those 80’s jackets with the band collar, for those of you not old enough to picture that. But she doesn’t have enough fabric, or time, to fix it.

Kevin is making a vest, not enough time for a jacket. Frantic working. Ricky is totally lost. Carmen sings and Ricky tells her to shut up, and she says she’s two minutes away from snapping, then he tells her to snap if she wants to, so she calls him a bitch and says she can‘t snap because he told her to shut up, and it kind of seems like something like happen but nothing does. Everyone is pissed and stressed and panicking. You can tell when they go home, they look exhausted.

Christian gets Jack to give him a piggyback ride into the workroom. (Kmanpat: “SO not worthy.“) Ricky is going balls-out “because if you go for it and fall on your ass, fall as hard as you can.” Jack is scrapping the vest due to time. They seem to have 3.5 hours in the morning. Weird. That is so much time. Carmen doesn’t even know if she has time for the shirt. Tim comes in to confirm they actually only have 2 hours. As the models come in much working commences. Kit’s model pretends like she stuck him with the needle. Hee. Ricky puts his model to work putting buttons on the shirt. Sweet P’s shirt is too small but the neck is huge. It doesn’t even have a collar, but Chris says there’s way worse stuff going down. Actually, looking at it again, when she’s talking about it, it doesn’t even have buttons. Mm, delicious boys. Ricky is using pins to hem things. Sweet P has a mental breakdown and tries to style something to hide the neckline. Carmen is seriously out of time. She drapes the shirt fabric around his chest under the jacket because that’s as much time as she had to make the shirt.

Tiki is back to guest judge. Jillian: 3 piece black suit with a black and white print shirt that looks hot and well made. Carmen: looks like crap, there’s no shirt and the jacket is lame. It’s only fastened at the waist so it looks really dated, and the model has a stupid hat on. Christian: the jacket has weirdly shaped lapels but the shirt is good. It’s got an asymmetrical neckline that is interesting. Kit: blazer and shirt, it looks OK if boring. Rami: now that jacket is Member’s Only. He thinks it looks youthful. Sweet P: the neck is huge, the rest of the shirt isn’t that great, the sleeves are way too short, and the pants make his hips look huge. Steven: looks hot, pants and a thin sweater. I realize I haven’t been listing colors, because they’ve all been in the khaki/navy/light blue palette. Not very exciting. Victorya: awesome pants, white jacket with a black collar but he looks like a chef. Kevin: pants vest shirt, tie, very sweet, like Nick’s outfit from season 2. It‘s got that same dark suit/colored shirt combo, only in purple and not pink. Chris: all dark, the jacket has no collar and a zipper. Jack: pants and a shirt, but it looks really well made, in a pink pinstripe pants and a pink striped top. Ricky: the suit ended up looking pretty good, but you can see the pins. You can see them sparkling. Elisa: crewneck shirt and vest and pants. It looks fine.

Jillian, Christian, Rami, Steven, Victorya, Chris, and Elisa are safe. Tiki tells Kit he likes her look; it’s conservative but has interest. It’s a fleece blazer, which looks cool. Kors says the fleece makes it not suck. Sweet P’s is messy but it has style. Heidi snipes that she let her model walk down there all messed up. Kors says at least her tie doesn’t suck, for all that it should be on someone who‘s 7‘3“. Kors loves Jack’s, and so does Tiki. Jack and his model look disturbingly similar. They could be brothers or cousins. Nina complains that he only has two pieces, but Heidi points out that two boring safe pieces are better than a bunch of crap. Nina calls out Ricky on the pins. Tiki would look like a fool, he says. Nina doesn’t even like the colors, calling them dull and boring. Tiki likes Kevin’s pocket square. Kors asks him to take off the pin holding the vest together, and then says they would never have known he couldn‘t put the button in. Heidi is bitchy for no reason, saying she wouldn‘t want Seal walking around like that. Kevin argues that Seal would look awesome, and I would tend to agree. Heidi just says it‘s more David Beckham than Tiki Barber. Woman, he just said he likes it. Were you not listening? Tiki says he’d wear it with a different shirt, which kind of defeats the purpose, but I think he should win this argument, so point for him. Carmen’s jacket is too short; he says everyone will only look at his ass. (Kmanpat and I: “Yes, and?“) Heidi laughs and Kors teases her for thinking the same thing we are. They make Carmen remove the blue fabric so her model is half naked. Kors says the crotch is insane. He has to once a season. I think it’s in his contract. He thinks this is a time management problem.

Time to talk about people while they‘re not around. Good: Kevin, who had a defined look. Jack, who didn’t take on more than he could finish, but had interest. Kit, whose outfit was versatile and the fleece jacket was unique. Bad: Sweet P. Nina just shakes her head. Kors at first thought she did it on purpose, with the short sleeves, and what not. Carmen, her outfit sucked all around. Kors wants to see clothes, not “it could have been“. Ricky, also not finished at all. Heidi says maybe they all thought they were better than they really are. Hmm.

Kevin is in. Jack wins. He’s getting his design on the Today Show. Yay! Kit is also in. Sweet P is saved, I guess because she at least finished her shirt, for all that it was ill-fitting. Both Carmen and Ricky didn’t finish their garments. Carmen is out. Man. I thought she’d get further than that. She’s good with leaving because she doesn’t do menswear, so I guess it’s not as much of a blow. She’s glad with what she’s learned.

Next time: Tim is not alone. Ricky and Victorya have a fight, and Jillian and Rami also. I guess it’s another

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