My monkey could do that

Thursday, April 5, 2018

Project Runway All Stars 4/5/18--"Making Fashion History" summary


Previously on “Project Runway All Stars”: the final four were asked to make six-look collections and they celebrated for about a day before Alyssa showed up with a stupid twist: tomorrow you'll show your signature look and then someone will be eliminated. I don't know why they need to do this dumb twist, and also why they couldn't have told them that up front, but certainly this is how this show usually goes down. So everyone shows and then they make everyone walk to another part of the set so they can do one of those stupid one hour challenges, making shit from scraps or whatever. They didn't even pretend they couldn't decide who should go home. THEN after that happened Isaac was all “let's not consider the one hour looks” because they just wanted to waste our time, I guess. Then Ken was sent home. He took it much better than he might have in the past. Oh and because they have one look done now they have to have seven looks in the collection instead of six. Shut up, show. (click for more)
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Friday, March 30, 2018

Project Runway All Stars 3/29/18--"History in the Making" summary


Previously on “Project Runway All Stars”: Nina showed up, which was nice, but then there was a dumb crossover with Candy Crush, which was not nice. The challenge was to make resortwear. Ken made a bright yellow jumpsuit with a sarong over the top and won. Edmond got “ski resort” and made a black suit and was sent home.
That's about it, you guys. The only other thing that happened is that Alyssa didn't look ridiculous. (click for more)

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Thursday, March 22, 2018

Project Runway All Stars 3/22/18--"Nina's Crushing It" summary


Previously on “Project Runway All Stars”: everyone had to make stagewear looks. The show tried to pretend we'd never seen stagewear before but if you've watched the regular show (and wouldn't you assume everyone had?) you've seen it. Anyway, random draw for genres. I feel like “country” gets screwed the most because the definition has changed and most people like me don't understand how exactly that's happened. Edmond won again with a rock-and-roll jumpsuit. Whatever. Helen was finally eliminated for making a black sequined peasant dress with sleeves that weren't attached to the dress. For “country”. (click for more)
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Thursday, March 15, 2018

Project Runway All Stars 3/15/18--"Rock Your Face Off" summary


Previously on “Project Runway All Stars”: Zac Posen showed up to ask everyone to make a red carpet look with their “signature technique”. Somehow they would use this to make their garments obvious. So when the gown walks down the runway, the judges should know it's yours. Alyssa continued to dress in an unflattering manner. Anne had better things to do so the contestants had to critique each other. Sure. Anthony won for sculpting a nice gown, and while Fabio also did great, the prize was to dress someone for a Lifetime Movie so Anthony fits that better anyway. Josh got really cocky about how he was going to finish no problem, and then didn't finish, and finally got sent home. (click for more)
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Friday, March 9, 2018

Top Chef 3/8/18--"Finale" summary


Previously on “Top Chef”: the final Quickfire required catching your own fish. The final three all managed to do this, and then we learned you have to cook trout to well done. Joseph won, and his advantage was to pick his sous chef and assign the others for the Elimination. Make a vegetarian dish for a Food and Wine Classic event, cooked on a big cauldron filled with coals. Joseph won again, with baby zucchini and pesto. Hipster Joe went home, for fancy toast (ha). (click for more)
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Thursday, March 8, 2018

Project Runway All Stars 3/8/18--"Posen on the Red Carpet" summary


Previously on “Project Runway All Stars”: everyone must be “inspired” by Isaac and work in color. I actually don't think they were supposed to copy Isaac so much as they wanted to advertise the exhibit he had at the Jewish Museum. Helen made some tricky pants, but was defeated by Stanley and his off the shoulder top and weird hip peplum that he made. I didn't like that peplum thing because even though it was under the skirt and not visible, it made a weird line in the skirt. Merline was finally sent home for making weird folded garments in fabrics that cannot be folded properly. (click for more)
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Friday, March 2, 2018

Top Chef 3/1/18--"A Little Place Called Aspen" summary


Previously on “Top Chef”: everyone finally got their challenge with Rocky Mountain oysters. You know you were waiting for it. Hipster Joe won by making fried and braised testicles, and won an extra half hour to work in the Elimination challenge. Everyone got to greet family members, who made family dishes for everyone. The Elimination challenge was to reinvent these dishes. Hipster Joe was very emotional, because the dish(es) his dad made were from his mom, who has passed away. Adrienne deconstructed her mom's gumbo, and everyone loved it so much she won. Sadly Carrie went home, mostly for nitpicking reasons (they wanted more sauce). (click for more)
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